Yet, there had to be something about the spirit of Bali that has made this Indonesian island my favourite holiday spot. Puzzled, I began writing down the things I treasure about Bali. The first image that springs to mind is sitting on the terrace of Ku De Ta on Oberoi beach at sunset.

This bar/restaurant/cigar lounge has been listed as one of the most chic venues in the world - and this it is, with its wooden deck jutting out towards the sea, cool pool, slinky loungers and aluminium chairs. For me, however, it's the place where my friends in Bali tend to hang out after a day on the beach.

It certainly attracts visiting celebrities and the "Porsche brigade" (our name for the rich wannabe stars), but others go there simply because it has the best setting, the best laid-back staff and the best music on the island. The food is also great, with great tapas platters and, my favourite, bowls of roasted clams. I have memories of quiet chats sitting on the edge of the deck, as well as some of the wildest and most raucous parties that have started off here.

Equally prominent are memories of having one day of silence whenever I visit Bali. I got the idea from a Spanish lawyer I met at a spa in Nusa Dua on one of my trips. As we waited for our massages, we chatted about the upcoming Nyepi Day, the Balinese New Year. On this day, the islanders' belief that they should not attract the attention of the spirits means that they stay as silent as possible. They don't talk, drive cars or use any electrical appliance.

Although I have never been in Bali on this day, apparently an eerie calm descends on the island for 24 hours. Well, the Spaniard had adapted this tradition to spending one day of his holidays in total silence - with no talking and no TV. The best way to achieve this is by not venturing out at all.

Lock yourself in your hotel room or villa, stock up on fruit, drinks and snacks, unplug the phone, put up the "do not disturb" and inform reception that you do not wish your room to be serviced or to be disturbed by anyone. It was more difficult than I had imagined. With the time to reflect, I felt a great need to chat to distant friends and relatives, as well as sort out outstanding problems immediately.

These days I find hotels that can offer me a walled villa with a swimming pool or jacuzzi, so that I can spend most of the day outdoors. One does feel totally cut-off from the world - but I "cheat" a little by having my mobile phone on to receive text messages. I would hate not to be contacted by my family in case of an emergency or missing out on earth-shattering news.

In reaction to my day of silence, the next day is usually spent making up for it, hitting the bars from late afternoon and having a real rip of a party. My usual hangout in the early hours of the morning is Double Six, a crazy nightclub that only gets going after 2am. With international DJs in attendance, the atmosphere is frenetic until dawn.

If I'm not in a "Double Six" mood, I head for the bars in Kuta, the hangouts of the surfers, old hippies and the backpacker crowd. My best fun is to join a group of "Kuta Cowboys" and watch them operate. These young men befriend the young (and not-so-young) girls who arrive in Bali in search of a holiday romance. Amazingly cosmopolitan and charming, they work in packs and know every chatting-up trick in the book! Hanging out with them (and learning a few tips) is a real treat.

Bali is not a small island, measuring around 90 miles wide to 55 miles from north to south. While most of the tourism is concentrated around Kuta and in the upmarket Nusa Dua peninsula, there's plenty to discover on the rest of the island. I am fascinated by the town of Ubud, with it's artistic community. On the coast there are always new resorts to see.

I had visited the Gunung Batur volcano a few times, but this time a local friend of mine took me to experience something totally different at the nearby Trunyan Village. Only accessible by boat, the locals have a strange way of burying their dead - they don't! They continue the ancient practice of leaving the bodies of their loved ones out in the open air to decay. It's a gory sight, but a great experience.

There's just so much that I love about about Bali - the vegetarian cafes in Ubud, the beautiful Aman resorts, the boutiques and trendy restaurants hidden down tiny lanes, the trinket shops of Kuta, the sales patter of the beach vendors, the crush of the markets of Denpasar... I could go on and on.

But I still find it hard to pin down the essential spirit of Bali that proves so alluring. I think it has something to do with the fact that the Balinese have managed to seamlessly blend a huge tourism industry into their traditions and lifestyle. The two have learnt to exist side-by-side.

There is an awareness that tourist dollars are the island's lifeblood, but Hindu traditions and religious ceremonies are a daily way of life in Bali. Small offerings to the gods are left outside businesses and homes every morning and every evening you can see processions of women carrying fruit on their head walking to the temples. For major events, processions can be miles long. Women dress in traditional sarongs, with lace blouses and sashes. The men carry small spirit houses. The mysticism they believe in somehow continues to pervade every town and village.

It is this easy lifestyle that allows so many different types of people to feel at home on Bali. From surfers and backpackers in guesthouses to the families and Japanese tour groups at the luxury resorts and the elite band of wealthy travellers who can afford the truly world-class boutique hotels. All feel part of the Bali scene and happily find their place in the sun. The fact that Bali manages to pull off this feat is remarkable. It truly is the Island of the Gods.